These standards guide my work as a Relationship Reset Expert and Betrayal Recovery Specialist. They reflect how I approach client relationships, professional boundaries, privacy, decision-making, referrals, and the responsibility that comes with being trusted with deeply personal parts of someone's life.
Relationship coaching often begins when something important feels uncertain. Trust may have been broken. Communication may have become reactive. A couple may be questioning whether they can rebuild, or an individual may be trying to understand what they are willing to continue accepting.
That makes clarity about my role just as important as clarity about yours.
I am responsible for showing up with honesty, appropriate boundaries, respect, preparation, and professional integrity. I can offer perspective, identify patterns, challenge assumptions, teach communication strategies, and help you examine what your choices require.
I will not make your relationship decisions for you.
My role is to help you see clearly enough to recognize what is true, what needs to change, what your relationship would require, and what you are willing to choose.
I treat clients with dignity and respect regardless of race, ethnicity, national origin, color, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity, age, religion, immigration status, disability, relationship history, or other personal characteristics. I do not discriminate in deciding whom I will serve.
I treat information shared in coaching as private and handle it with care. I do not intentionally disclose client information without permission except when disclosure is required by law, necessary to respond to an immediate safety concern, or otherwise permitted under the agreements governing our work.
I maintain appropriate professional boundaries with clients and avoid relationships, conduct, or conflicts of interest that could exploit trust, impair professional judgment, or create confusion about the nature of our work together.
I communicate fees, payment expectations, scheduling terms, and relevant policies as clearly as possible before services are provided. I do not intentionally conceal fees or create charges that were not disclosed.
I communicate directly and respectfully, including when the conversation is difficult. I may challenge a pattern, assumption, inconsistency, or behavior when doing so serves the work, but I do not use humiliation, intimidation, or personal attacks as coaching tools.
I work within the scope of relationship coaching and betrayal recovery support. When a client's needs require psychotherapy, diagnosis, medical treatment, legal advice, crisis intervention, or another service outside my professional role, I will recommend that the client seek an appropriately qualified professional.
I represent my experience, training, services, and professional role accurately. I do not knowingly make false claims about my qualifications, outcomes, or what relationship coaching can accomplish.
I remain committed to professional development through continued study, training, education, and examination of the ideas and practices relevant to relationship coaching, betrayal recovery, communication, and responsible client care.
I provide guidance, perspective, structure, and direct feedback without deciding whether a client should stay, leave, reconcile, separate, forgive, or continue a relationship. Those decisions belong to the people whose lives will be shaped by them.
I take responsibility for my professional conduct and remain willing to examine my decisions, communication, boundaries, and practices. When something requires correction, clarification, or a different professional response, I will address it directly.
I recognize that relationship coaching is not the right or only form of support for every situation. I maintain relationships with licensed therapists and other qualified professionals and may recommend complementary or alternative support when it better serves a client's needs.
My personal experience with betrayal and rebuilding informs my perspective, but I do not treat my marriage as a model another person or couple must follow. My decision to rebuild is not a prescription for reconciliation, just as another person's decision to leave would not be a prescription for separation.
I provide relationship coaching and betrayal recovery support. I am not a licensed therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, physician, attorney, financial advisor, or emergency service provider.
My services do not constitute psychotherapy, psychological or medical diagnosis, medical treatment, legal advice, financial advice, or crisis mental health care.
Relationship coaching may be used alongside therapy or other professional services when appropriate. It is not intended to replace care that requires a licensed or otherwise qualified professional.
If you are deciding between coaching and therapy, you can read Therapy vs Coaching .
Coaching is collaborative. I may be direct. I may tell you when I see a pattern that is undermining trust, when two people are having different conversations without realizing it, or when someone's actions are inconsistent with what they say they want.
That guidance does not transfer responsibility for your decisions to me.
Clients remain responsible for their choices, actions, relationships, health, safety, finances, legal matters, and decisions made during or after coaching.
When another form of professional support is appropriate, I expect clients to seek that support rather than asking coaching to serve a role it cannot responsibly fill.
Information provided on the Understanding Ear website, blog, newsletters, videos, audio recordings, social media, courses, workbooks, downloadable materials, presentations, and other educational content is provided for general informational and educational purposes.
This content does not create a coaching relationship and should not be interpreted as individualized relationship coaching, psychotherapy, psychological or medical advice, diagnosis, legal advice, financial advice, or other licensed professional advice.
Relationships and personal circumstances differ. Information that is useful in one situation may not be appropriate in another. Readers and viewers are responsible for considering their own circumstances and obtaining advice from appropriately qualified professionals when needed.
No specific result or relationship outcome is promised or guaranteed. Decisions made based on educational content remain the responsibility of the individual making them.
To the fullest extent permitted by applicable law, Vanessa Cardenas and Understanding Ear, LLC disclaim liability for losses, damages, or harm arising from reliance on general educational content provided through this website or related materials.
Unless otherwise stated, original content and materials published by Understanding Ear, LLC are protected intellectual property and may not be copied, reproduced, distributed, sold, or republished without permission except as permitted by law.
Trust is central to the work I do. That makes professional responsibility more than a statement on a website.
By maintaining this Code of Ethics, I commit to approaching my work with honesty, respect, appropriate boundaries, continued learning, and accountability for the role I hold in my clients' lives.
Vanessa Cardenas
Relationship Reset Expert & Betrayal Recovery Specialist
Founder, Understanding Ear
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